Let me start this off by saying that I am not perfect by any means...  In fact I am probably one of the most ridiculously fucked up people you will ever meet. I am pretty much completely un-educated, have some pretty significant mental health issues, I smoke cigarrettes and pot, I am immature, dirty, vulgar, and I often speak before thinking about what I am saying. But isn't that what makes a BLOG interesting. I try to write about what I see and the things I think need changed. Am I always right...  NO...  Am I usually wrong...  Ask my girlfriend and you will always get a "yes"...  When I started this BLOG I was pretty sure I was going to piss a lot of people off. Well guess what, I have totally accomplished that. But what the hell, I try and write this as I think and I do not want to edit my statements. I want them to be raw...  I am learning as I go and this post is basically to clear a bunch of loose ends up.

I have only lived in this neighborhood of Wilkinsburg for about a year and a half. Twenty five years ago there was a notorious street gang that called Wilkinsburg home known as the "Larimer Avenue Wilkinsburg" Gang. This gang ran the streets of Wilkinsburg and arguably made it one of the most dangerous places to live in Allegheny County. Their were shootings on a daily basis and a lot of the people that I write about in this blog were living here durring that time. If they had not fought the gang then it would not be possible for someone like me to live here. I am forever gratefull for the things these residents have accomplished, but that doesn't mean that I am going to agree with everything these residents do today. Although I respect what was accomplished years ago I do have issues with the way our neighborhood is run today. Why the hell should I keep my issues with the neighborhood silent. I love this neighborhood and everyone in it, just because I have a problem with someone doesn't mean I hate them. If you have a problem with a politition or a non-profit organization should you tell them or just let it go. I think the answer is to tell them.

I will admit that I have been pretty pissed off recently and my posts show that...  But that's all it was, a pissed off rant... And it is also my personal view, not anyone elses...  Just because I have a problem with something does not mean that my view is the only right view. Sometimes I think something for years and a 5 minute conversation is all it takes to change my mind. I think that is very human...  If nothing else I would like my rants to promote conversation. I am tired of people telling me what I should and shouldn't think, they are my thoughts. All I really want is peace, which is different coming from someone who has no real idea what peace is. My first thought is often WAR and I can admit that...  It never lasts long but it is my initial reaction... 

The most difficult thing I am dealing with is losing my garden...  Is it the end of the world? No...  But damnit it is important to me...  In fact it makes me so mad that I think like a kid, I'll bet most of the people reading this can relate to that...  Is losing it the end of the world? Hell no...  But the thought of it makes me cringe! I go up and down with this everyday...  One day I can say Fuck it! but then the next day I am ready to freak out over it...  One thing that I can say is that no matter what happens I know something else will come along and I will get absorbed in that instead! Life is not easy and sometimes I feel like a ten year old completely lost in this giant world with people telling me what to do at every turn. Just bear with me...  I am aware that I can go off over something and do not want to edit these comments, after all they are how I learn...

People who read this blog are going to get pissed off but I don't think I should retract any of my statements based on that alone. I am not the only person who lives in my neighborhood and just because I say I don't like something or someone does not mean that my view is final. I may hate someone today but that could change by tomorrow! Everything posted in my BLOG is OPINION and not fact by any means.

I know this is short but it had to be posted! Nothing is meant to be personal but if it is taken that way then o well! This is just my opinion and I make no claim to it being fact... Most people will see it completely different than me and I feel they are entitled to their opinion. I am not perfect and if you would like to start a BLOG and post everything you think is wrong with me then go right on ahead. In fact I will do it myself! My next blog post will be about me and everything I do wrong. Maybe it will help me learn some important things that need changed and will better my life!

I end my posts with "Peace" and I should mention it is only a wish! I do not know how to achieve peace any more than you do...  If someone figures it out then please fill me in, I would love to find peace in my lifetime and the only other time I have ever felt "peace" was right before I attempted to kill myself! I am waging wars inside myself that may spill over into this BLOG and thats just the way it is going to be... 

Peace - Chris Condello